Quote Category

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

I declare that I am a bachelor.

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.

God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.

Always forgive your enemies – nothing annoys them so much.

Don’t be humble… you’re not that great.

They do certainly give very strange, and newfangled, names to diseases.

Since everything is in our heads, we had better not lose them.

Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people.