Quote Tag

Actually I consider myself a superficially normal looking person who has a vast collection of bizarre silly porn hidden in his basement, as all normal looking people do, and I’m keeping it hidden from everyone in the world except those few people with access to the Internet.

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.

As they say around the Texas Legislature, if you can’t drink their whiskey, screw their women, take their money, and vote against ’em anyway, you don’t belong in office.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

It is hard for the ape to believe he descended from man.

I don’t want to be stinky poo poo girl, I want to be happy flower child.

I’m not a very good advertisement for the American school system.

In fact, when you get right down to it, almost every explanation Man came up with for anything until about 1926 was stupid.

I ain’t no movie star, man. I’m a booty star.

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.