Quote Tag

I like the idea of being out there regularly with an audience and with a funny gang of people. That’s what I grew up with – doing television, doing shows every week.

I don’t deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it.

There are plenty of good five cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter.

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

There’s a clip where he had someone miming me running around from keyboard to keyboard. Oh dear, I am sure a lot of people didn’t know what he was going on about.

You take away all the other luxuries in life, and if you can make someone smile and laugh, you have given the most special gift: happiness.

That’s basically what I’m doing when I’m tapping them – getting my toes to the end of my shoes.

My whole life, I’ve been telling jokes.

All my pictures are built around the idea of getting in trouble and so giving me the chance to be desperately serious in my attempt to appear as a normal little gentleman.

I’m not counting any chickens.